I don't care who you are, how much you have traveled, how long you have lived abroad, how much you know about the country you are going to, but there is always the potential of Culture shock. I'm not saying you will always get it, I'm not saying it will be extreme, but the potential is there. I traveled Asia over the span of 7 months last year, coming to China twice within that and preparing for my move through learning about China. I am by no means claiming to be an expert, but I am saying I prepared as much as one could expect me to prepare and I have still had moments of Culture shock and Culture anger.
I think Culture shock comes in stages, then alternates between different feelings/stages. When I first came to China I was filled with love and excitement over my new country. After a couple months, my love and excitement turned to frustration and aggression. How did some of this frustration and aggression manifest itself? When people would stare, I would stare back, until they turned away. I one time stated walking backwards cuz this one guy would not look away, haha he eventually did. I've heard of people screaming in English, hitting cars (I haven't hit a car, but I've stood in front of one and stared down the driver, till it got out of my way), chasing down taxi swoopers (people who jump in the taxis you waved down...sadly happens quite often) and so on. My aggression and anger towards the general Chinese public has subsided and now turned towards those closer to me.
While I love my friends I'm going through the Culture Stage of "Friend Frustration", for lack of better words. And I truly think its culture. I'm sorry, but in my culture if I hung out with you all day I don't want to talk to you that night on the phone! If I don't answer your phone call, please don't call me me again...and again and again and again. I'm probably busy. Work, if I tell you I don't have free time to work, why do you insist on scheduling me anyways to have me cancel on you? Or if you tell me the class is only on Fridays why do you ask me if I have free time the other days of the week? Or if I quit, why do you think I want to come back? I quit for a reason. If we plan on meeting at a certain time, why are you surprised I'm waiting for you at "the meeting place"? I've also been wondering why do you want to invite me to your home and then let me sit on the couch the whole week watching Chinese TV I don't understand? How would that be fun and/or entertaining for me? Or why do you insist on showing me around your University, I'm not interested in whatever it is you teach!! Just because I'm a foreigner and I called you a friend for the sake of my class, does not mean I actually want to exchange numbers. In fact I'm kinda done meeting new Chinese friends, its hard enough to hang out with the ones I have while going through this stage of Cultural adjustment. If I tell you I have a Chinese teacher, stop telling me about how great of a teacher you are and about how much mine sucks, I like mine and I don't like you! These are just some of the feeling that emerge as I go through the stages of Culture shock. This one will eventually subside and I will enter a new stage. Eventually I might move between the stages with relative ease. One day loving China the next day in a rage.
Don't get me wrong as I write this, I love living here, this blog post are for those who want to know the real lifeness of it. If you want to see the smile only, forget about this one. Thank you all.
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Nomadic Lifestyle Over
I now have a home! I walked in, when it was filthy, with moving boxes everywhere after climbing 6 flights of stars and I saw it....the potential. Love at first sight. I can't tell you why it resonated with me, but it did and on top of it it fell under my budget and within complete convenience.
My new house is a 3 bedroom apartment on the top floor with no elevator. It took me hours to clean it after the previous owners left it in a hurry (a last minute move, no bugs or anything), it needs a new paint job and the couches are pretty rough looking. But I have comfortable place to sleep, I have a place to make my food, a place to have friends over, a place to do my work and when I walk in I feel good.
A couple things to mention around this, one has to do with pollution and the other with cats. Pollution happens to be a huge problem in China, in case you didn't know and is one of the reasons I run in the mornings (the pollution is not as stirred up). A couple hundred yards from my house is a "smoke stack". A huge tower that emits smoke hundreds of feet into the air. It has become a bit of a landmark for me. When I'm on the bus, or even walking, I can see it from a couple miles away and know that's where my house lays. Good thing is it only runs a few months a year. It runs in the winter to burn coal for heating for people's homes. But after seeing how many of these things there are and how much smoke is getting pushed out, I can say I'm completely unsurprised about the pollution problem (more on this later).
So cats. You don't see them at first. But they are there, lots of them, none of them neutered or spayed. This is sad, but the only thing probably keeping the numbers low is the unlikelihood of kittens surviving. Little to no food source, not many places to hide and lots of competition. Why do I mention the cats? Because I feel they are part of living in a home in China, as part of the scenery as raccoons or squirrels in the states. They are both pests, but keep the other pests away. I don't see rats, cuz I see cats. And honestly our garbage might be a little bigger, if it weren't for our friends, the cats.
I don't have much else to add, except I have a house and it is thrilling, you are welcome over anytime :)
My new house is a 3 bedroom apartment on the top floor with no elevator. It took me hours to clean it after the previous owners left it in a hurry (a last minute move, no bugs or anything), it needs a new paint job and the couches are pretty rough looking. But I have comfortable place to sleep, I have a place to make my food, a place to have friends over, a place to do my work and when I walk in I feel good.
A couple things to mention around this, one has to do with pollution and the other with cats. Pollution happens to be a huge problem in China, in case you didn't know and is one of the reasons I run in the mornings (the pollution is not as stirred up). A couple hundred yards from my house is a "smoke stack". A huge tower that emits smoke hundreds of feet into the air. It has become a bit of a landmark for me. When I'm on the bus, or even walking, I can see it from a couple miles away and know that's where my house lays. Good thing is it only runs a few months a year. It runs in the winter to burn coal for heating for people's homes. But after seeing how many of these things there are and how much smoke is getting pushed out, I can say I'm completely unsurprised about the pollution problem (more on this later).
So cats. You don't see them at first. But they are there, lots of them, none of them neutered or spayed. This is sad, but the only thing probably keeping the numbers low is the unlikelihood of kittens surviving. Little to no food source, not many places to hide and lots of competition. Why do I mention the cats? Because I feel they are part of living in a home in China, as part of the scenery as raccoons or squirrels in the states. They are both pests, but keep the other pests away. I don't see rats, cuz I see cats. And honestly our garbage might be a little bigger, if it weren't for our friends, the cats.
I don't have much else to add, except I have a house and it is thrilling, you are welcome over anytime :)
Friday, February 3, 2012
Some Culturally Relevant Information
Red Envelopes: During holidays or special events, rather than exchanging gifts there are red envelopes. So for Spring festival the parents give their kids money in the red envelopes. The kids don't give their parents anything, but eventually, there is a switch. The switch happens at different times depending on the family tradition, it might happen when the kids gets a job, get married, or turns a certain age. Red envelopes are also given at weddings.
Toasting: I don't know the story behind this, but apparently when your toasting with someone, the amount you drink is how long you will be friends. So for instance if you drink it all in one toast, it means you will be friend's forever. Obviously with all the toasting people weren't doing that, but when I toasted with the aunt, I noticed she was looking at me and we had an awkward moment where neither of us put down our cups, but we weren't drinking either, just kinda watching each other.
Eating: This one I have experienced a lot, I eat till I'm full, then I'm told to eat more. It's part of the hospitality, but man I walk away with a full stomach. After this happening a couple times I learned a helpful phrase (since “I'm full didn't work), “Bu Chi le”-basically mans I don't want to eat any more. Which might sound rude, but its not cuz everyone was saying it.
Some stories.....
The story behind Spring Festival is, there once was an evil creature called the “Nian”. And it terrified everyone because each year it would slowly family by family take them and the families were never seen again. Eventually some people discovered that the "Nian" was scared of red and loud noises, so they started to shoot off firecrackers and fireworks to scare it away. It eventually did leave, but people continued the tradition in memory of it's absence.
Why is red a lucky color in Chinese culture? In ancient Chinese times, fire was important. If you had fire you would live, it kept you warm, helped cook food, scared away wild animals and more. The color of fire is mostly red, so fire was associated with good luck and as Chinese culture has grown, the idea of red portraying good luck has remained.
Lanterns are also part of every Chinese holiday and the reason for these is much the same as fire. Lanterns were used to carry light (probably fire in their earliest stages) and used to scare away wild animals and such. Now they are part of the culture and you see them being hung for every Chinese holiday.
Toasting: I don't know the story behind this, but apparently when your toasting with someone, the amount you drink is how long you will be friends. So for instance if you drink it all in one toast, it means you will be friend's forever. Obviously with all the toasting people weren't doing that, but when I toasted with the aunt, I noticed she was looking at me and we had an awkward moment where neither of us put down our cups, but we weren't drinking either, just kinda watching each other.
Eating: This one I have experienced a lot, I eat till I'm full, then I'm told to eat more. It's part of the hospitality, but man I walk away with a full stomach. After this happening a couple times I learned a helpful phrase (since “I'm full didn't work), “Bu Chi le”-basically mans I don't want to eat any more. Which might sound rude, but its not cuz everyone was saying it.
Some stories.....
The story behind Spring Festival is, there once was an evil creature called the “Nian”. And it terrified everyone because each year it would slowly family by family take them and the families were never seen again. Eventually some people discovered that the "Nian" was scared of red and loud noises, so they started to shoot off firecrackers and fireworks to scare it away. It eventually did leave, but people continued the tradition in memory of it's absence.
Why is red a lucky color in Chinese culture? In ancient Chinese times, fire was important. If you had fire you would live, it kept you warm, helped cook food, scared away wild animals and more. The color of fire is mostly red, so fire was associated with good luck and as Chinese culture has grown, the idea of red portraying good luck has remained.
Lanterns are also part of every Chinese holiday and the reason for these is much the same as fire. Lanterns were used to carry light (probably fire in their earliest stages) and used to scare away wild animals and such. Now they are part of the culture and you see them being hung for every Chinese holiday.
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