Having A Dog

As I'm sure all my readers know by now, I have a dog, I bought him about a year ago. In fact right around Halloween, I gave up my costume money for my dog. When I bought him I promised myself so many things. I promised myself I would never compare having a dog to being a parent. That I would never let him get away with things. That he would always just be a dog. Well, less than a year later and I have broken all of those promises I made to myself.

I should have known I was going to break all these promises immediately, but denial is a sweet nectar to our guilt. Just a couple days after getting Otis, my dog, I was at a friends house and we were eating dinner. I had Otis on my lap while I ate. And one of my friends turned to me and said, "Oh! Your that kind of dog owner!" I tried to deny it, explain it away, no he has a lot of energy right now, he's not potty trained yet, I don't have a leash.... excuse ... excuse ... excuse. I felt the truth of the statement, but I kept telling myself, he is JUST a dog, I am master. I own him.

The first promise to slowly start eroding away was my promise to not compare owning a dog to parenthood, but its hard when all the mother's around me compared my dog to their kids. I promise, I didn't start it! Perhaps, it was a way I could connect with friends, my friends who are married with kids while I am single with dog. (Sounds like the beginning to a sad story.)

So, as all my peers started to call me Otis's mother so did I. I will confess it was painful, but liberating. I will influence this creature's habits from now on out! But if you take this first step, you can never let him be JUST a dog again. Which began my downfall into letting him behave very un-dog-like.

At first this wasn't a problem because he had some other dogs in the house, but when they left he began some curious habits. First, when I would sit down to eat at the dinner table he would jump on the chair next to me and sit there too. Step one, thinks he's human. After doing this for awhile I started to find he had jumped on the table, step two; he knows he's not human, so what is he-cat?

I'm happy to say I killed that habit (after a looong time), but I couldn't bring myself to tell him no to jumping on chairs-it was so cute! Which is where my final downfall lay, letting him get away with things.

I tried to tell myself that I had to be stern, if you want your dog (or child) to create good habits, you have to be consistent and I was always one of those single people who couldn't believe it when parents weren't consistent with their kids. Now, I understand. Sometimes,

I catch Otis chewing on pillows and I look away and think "Yes! A moment to myself!" Sometimes he jumps on the couch (which he is technically not allowed to do) and I think "How cute!"

My conclusion is this; I am a terrible parent, but the same as any other. I am completely biased towards my creature and think all others suck. Mess with my stuff (dog/child), you mess with me, angry mama bear.

What does Riding the Bus and Street Dancing Have in Common?

I begin this blog with a question; what does riding the bus and street dancing have in common? If you look at specifically China, not much. Or specifically America, the same answer. But if you decide to switch the question to what does riding the bus in America and street dancing in China have in common? A whole lot. Or the other question; what does street dancing in America and riding the bus in China have in common? Way too much.

Riding the bus in America, is a fairly comfortable, if not sometimes long event. We get on, we find our seat, we have our space, we observe people and sometimes we may chat with someone else. But usually we find our own thing to do and we avoid eye contact, unless a friend is with us. China's street dancing is surprisingly similar.

We go to a large square or park where there are many other people we don't know. You find your space, not touching any other person, you observe and follow. Maybe if we are feeling open or bold we will chat with our neighbor, or if we have been going for awhile we will at the very least nod at the people we know. While this is the norm, I will say, when I went I broke all the social conventions. And let's just say we had quite the crowd.

Let's move onto the other comparison we are making. Now American street dancing can look many different ways, it could be awesome break dancing in your little square with a big crown around you and I wish that's how it was on the bus, but I'm thinking of something different. I'm thinking more club style and before you say that doesn't happen on the streets I would like to disagree; have yous seen the new footloose? Yes well there is bumping and grinding out in public, and the movies never lie. The point I'm trying to make is street dancing in America, or if you must make me say it, club dancing in America is eerily similar to riding a bus in China...its scary!

I first noticed this experience two years ago, when I moved here. I haven't written about it because I simply didn't know how to, but this analogy gave me a good opening. Now, riding the bus is not always so intense, only mostly. When the buses are over crowded and you are slipping by every single person, body rubbing against body. This might be sexy, if the people were mostly clean, perhaps your own age and if there was something other than the Chinese radio station playing.

In America, I didn't go clubbing much, the idea of shaking my booty for a stranger didn't appeal (for some reason), but now after living here I feel all clubbed out. I have never grinded on people so much in my life (by accident of course), been grinded on (hopefully by accident), given and been given lap dances like this in my life (which happens when the chairs face the aisles of the bus and it is so crowded you are pretty much sitting in that person's lap).

I know there may be quite the diversity of ages reading this and I hope it doesn't scare you, while for those who understand, hopefully this makes you laugh. But this is my almost daily experience, not street dancing, but riding the bus, which as you can see is much scarier than street dancing.

A Post to Bring You Up To Date

Sorry for not writing for so long, but after living here for two years something terrible has happened... life has become normal.

The last two or three months have been filled with thoughts of "I should write, but..." I have gone out, I've seen things, I've lived life, I've met people, I've had conversations (English and Chinese I'm proud to say), but it now takes a lot of imagination for me to write something that I think will interest people. My mind has moved forward, to doing other things and my blog about China has been left in the dust. Having said that I will try to continue to write semi-consistently for the next 6 months. Why for 6 months? Because that is how much longer I have in China, then I move back to the States to begin an even scarier journey...(imagine scary music playing) University! Full-time! The horror! The expense! I can't talk about it too much or I might scare myself away from it.

I will give you an update to what has happened in the last few months, then hopefully my future blogs will be more relevant to now time or not relevant at all, but at lest humorous and perhaps enlightening to my life.

Last Spring I went home for 6 weeks, during that time my sister got engaged. When I returned to China, life was slow, not much going on, so I tried to work as much as I could (which unfortunately didn't happen as much as I would have liked) cuz I then had to go back to the States to attend a wedding. During my couple months back home in China I got sick, I literally lost my voice for 2 weeks. Crazy.

At the end of July I started my journey back to Seattle. It took me about 3 days to make it to there. An hour bus to the train station, 5 hours delay, a 22 or 23 hour ride (on a hard seat nonetheless), an hour bus ride to my hostel and overnight at the hostel and a 12 hour flight to Seattle, where I was greeted by my beautiful family.

I was only in Seattle for a week, the first two days were spent on mostly dealing with my visa stuff (had to apply for a new visa before going back to China), the next couple days after that, seeing a couple friends, the next couple days dealing with wedding stuff (which was beautiful by the way) and the last few days was spent with family. I then flew back to China with a friend.

My friend and I spent two busy, busy, busy days in Beijing, ran to the train station (made it with only a few minutes to spare), went to Xi'an (stayed with one of my friends there) for a few days, then flew to Xining (my current city) for a week. The day after my friend left, one of my Xi'an friends came and visited for a week. After she left two new roommates moved in, the following week my part-time online school started up again. And my weeks since then have been full of helping some things other people already have going, doing school and taking care of dogs (did I mention I was taking care of 3 dogs for 3 weeks? No I thought I forgot that ;) But now its me and Otis, two cool new roommates and an exciting 6 months to look forward to.

Life has been full and busy, but manageable and fun. I'm excited (and scared shitless-excuse my french) for my move back to America, but I am so happy to have 6
months left in China. Hopefully my last 6 months of blog
posts will bring you plenty of enjoyment as well.                            Above a pic of my two friends that visited



My new haircut (I'm trying to bring ya up to date):

The Clash of Two Cultures

When you live in a culture that is not your own you are unnaturally bringing two cultures together. When I say unnaturally, I mean it feels odd. It seems off, it is weird for your home culture, it is weird for your host culture. But it is also natural, I mean natural in that it naturally happens, you usually can't help it.

One of the most obvious ways it happens is in language. You learn a word for something new and you like the sound of it, so you throw it in to your day to day life. Other ways you bring together cultures can be in your eating habits, in the way you dress, and in the way you organize life. The longer you live in another culture the more "You know you live in (insert place) when...(blah blah blah) happens."

Recently I went home and while I was home my sister, Nadia, bought me a WSU lanyard to represent my school and to compete against Nicole (she goes to UW-the schools are rivals). I don't know how you wear lanyards, but I noticed the cool thing to do in Seattle was to tuck the key part in your pocket and let the lanyard hang free to show your allegiance to whatever (at least I'm assuming that's why you do it). So, being part of the cool crowd myself, that's what I did. And I tried to bring that practice to China. I had quite a few instances where my students or even strangers would come up to me and tell me something was hanging out of my pocket. The first couple times I tried to explain "Oh no, I do it because it looks good." Well, after so many times of blank looks and confusion, its just not worth it and you tuck it in for the time being.

I recently realized why some things in cultures are like water and oil-they don't mix. Once, while I was running for the bus my lanyard snagged on a bush and I almost missed the bus by running back to get it. That was the warning, but enlightenment came when I tried to get off the bus. First, the bus slams on the breaks, so four people fall on me. Then I fight my way through the crowd to get off, cuz in China the bus don't wait for no one. Well, I successfully slide through the crown and am about to hop off the bus when I notice my lanyard has attached itself to a high school girl's backpack.

So I go back and try to pull it off, but its stuck. The driver is tired of waiting for me, so he starts to shut the doors, but I stick out one foot and hold it open and am still pulling on the girls backpack with my lanyard, while saying some embarrassing English words. Finally, I lose patience and let the stress get to me and I pull hard and my lanyard comes lose, but the bus is moving now, no time to wait. So, I jump off the moving bus and the doors slam shut behind me and I look at my lanyard, I had pulled the poor girl's zipper of her backpack.

Lesson learned, sometimes cultures don't mix.

Back in China

This spring I went to the States for a six week trip. It was a busy time, but great to see everyone and always funny when facing reverse culture shock (I had the hardest time remembering to flush the toilet paper). While I was home my youngest sister, Nadia, got engaged (to Sam)! The wedding is planned for August third. I couldn't stay over the summer because I had responsibilities here, but I'm planning on another quick two weeker for the wedding. It will be perfect timing cuz I will need a new visa as well!

This summer is going along slowly, but its been nice to slow it down and breath for a little while. I have a feeling things will pick up quickly in the fall, so I am appreciating this season of "chill" (not cold, but slang for calm). Its nice because with the extra free time I have been able to study Chinese a bit more, practice playing Ukulele, writing (not on my blog) and some other random things that I haven't had time for in awhile.

This month I turned 23 and my dog turned 10 months old! He is doing good, he is full grown and quite big guy, but still very pupyish which is cute and annoying as most pet owners will understand.

While I was home this last time I made a quick 3 minute video that is a recap on my last two years in China (yes this month makes it two years-wow) and my update for the future. If you are interested in watching it you can contact my other sister, Nicole.

But for those not interested, here is the news that I was waiting to broadcast until I was (first of all) sure and (second of all) had told my friends here in China... next year I will be moving back to the States.

When I moved to China I thought it was going to be about two or three years, this last January I started processing my time here and what I wanted the future to look like. I love China and there were so many reasons I wanted to stay and I could think of so many opportunities. But when I broke down what my priorities were, one was finishing my University education. Since coming to China I have started going part time online to WSU. It has been good, but at this point I want to finish it up and do something with it. Which led me to going full time to school back in Washington. So next year (most likely Spring or Summer) I will move back and start going to school full-time in the fall. It will take about three years to finish, and after that? Only God and time can tell.

Although I should warn you, I doubt it includes spending too much time in America ;)

Some observations from Nepal

So I always said I would revisit Nepali culture, but never really got around to it, now I will. One thing is: Nepal is very different from China or the States.

In Nepal, based on what someone said, the people are rich but the Government is poor. And at least in Kathmandu it appears to be that way. The houses are beautiful, spacious and big, while the electricity is turned off for most of the day and the roads are usually dirt. If they are paved, then the pavement is very old and in need of much repair with potholes everywhere. Which makes the driving even that more interesting, on top of already being a bit crazy.

While I was there I used public transportation to get around. Public transport in Nepal is different from America or China in a lot of ways. One, there aren't real buses. The "bus system" usually consists of 15 passenger vans owned by private individuals who simply run the route to make cash. There is the driver, then usually a smaller helper, the age of the "helper" can range from 7 to 27, but the helpers tend to be small slim boys. The helper is the one who opens and shut the door, collects the money, convinces people to get in "his" van and tells the driver where to stop.

Another thing about Nepal is the street dogs. They are everywhere! I know a popular thought in America is that its inhumane to kill dogs that no one wants, but after being in Nepal and seeing the dirty starving, bug infested dogs, I can't help but think that maybe its inhumane not to kill them. The street dogs keep on breeding, the only thing that keeps the numbers low is probably being hit by cars, starvation and sickness. Yes I know its sounds terrible, it wasn't meant to sound nice.

Another aspect is food. I am often asked if I like Indian food and my usual response is "Not in Nepal or India" (Nepali and India food have some similarities). The reason for this is because the common meal is rice and dahl. Dahl is a soup like substance that usually goes over your rice. If your lucky you might get some lentils or cilantro in your dahl, if your not lucky it'll be just another name for flavorless soup. It's not bad, but when you eat it for lunch and dinner for a week or more straight, believe me it gets old.

When you go to Nepal many senses go on overload, smell sight, sound, etc. But one thing that sticks out more than anything else is the kindness of the people. You smile and they smile back, you try and communicate with them and they try back (and most of the time, especially with the younger generation they can speak very good English)  I will be the first to confess that Kathmandu is not my favorite place, but Nepal is. If you get a chance to go, I definitely recommend it.

Tattoos in China

I got a new tattoo with my friend and it was interesting because of how its changed.  Two years ago I got a tattoo in this same city.  My friends and I searched high and low for a whole day before we found a reputable tattoo artist that I didn't think would pass on herpes.  Then we offered him a price and he took it.  Now two years later, the whole process has changed.  On one road, close to where we both live we found three really clean shops with talented artists and system of pricing.  The only reason we didn't stop at the fist shop was cuz the prices have gone up!

In America tattoo artists charge by time and usually have a $50 limit, no matter how small the tattoo may be.  What I found in China is, tattoo artists usually charge by size, centimeter to be exact, and some have a limit, it seemed 200 RMB was normal (about $30).  We were able to talk one guy down to 150 RMB each person (about $25) and mine is about 2in by 1in, not too big, but considering the new system of charge it was a deal!

Other differences are how the tattoo artist went about doing it.  This could strictly be his style, not necessarily a Chinese things, but first he drew the tattoo on my arm, himself, then outlined the words with an ink-less tool and eventually filled it all in with black ink.  This was so when the ink was wiped away (they wipe away the area every so often to clear the blood and ink) he would still know the basic outline.  He also seemed to take way longer than I though was necessary.  But there could be a number of factors that play into this, perhaps his tool was not as good as other ones that I've been tattooed with, or maybe its part of the thinking - if you take longer its better work.

All in all it was interesting to see this change in China.  To me is was a sign of how the country is changing and the people who were on the fringes are now being able to open a place of business with relative ease.  One last interesting thing I noticed was of all the tattoo artists I saw (four in total), only one had noticeable tattoos.  I just wanted to make note of it, because from the outset it would appear tattoos are becoming more culturally acceptable, but I wonder if within family circles they still may be considered an an object of shame.